Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
