I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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