Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(251): View more from Alabama

Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.

Fav 14 3844 851
share tweet
(781): View more from Massachusetts

I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.

Fav 8 2403 979
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(703): View more from Virginia

protesters in toronto definately have the best pot

Fav 17 4915 1376
share tweet
(253): View more from Washington

Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.

Fav 28 2183 5868
share tweet
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(561): View more from Florida

i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.

Fav 9 2599 1534
share tweet
(407): View more from Florida

Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?

Fav 22 3988 1270
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.

Fav 3 1271 2092
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(816): View more from Missouri

Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?

Fav 6 1067 586
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(978): View more from Massachusetts

What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.

Fav 2 17 64
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT