so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
