im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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