didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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