he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize