so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
