are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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