How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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