I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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