kristin has been a bad kristin
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
