I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
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I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
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A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
i out mim tonsoeep
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