Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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