just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
