idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
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and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
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You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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