Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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