everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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