How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize