new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize