I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
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He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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