The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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