just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
