I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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