i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
