I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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