You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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