Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
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Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
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she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize