Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
