I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
