people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
