I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize