This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
