Plan B is the new Plan A
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
