it's too hot outside to masturbate.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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