I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
