Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
