he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
