okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
