hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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