i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
