It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
