If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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