You're completely useless in the revolution.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
