There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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