glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize