Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
