While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
