One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize