Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
