oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
